Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Once a runner...

Well, surgeries over! So far they look better, but still have to wait until the swelling goes down. From the first 4 surgeries, we determined that I'm allergic to dermabond, as I would have an itchy rash that covered my chest after every surgery. This time they only used steristrips and that white medical tape...yep, same rash. Guess I'm allergic to all medical adhesive!

Anyway, I'm not here to talk about surgeries...I'm a bit bummed this evening and thought blogging would help me out a bit. I feel like any running talent I had is completely gone. Went out for a jog tonight-thought it'd be perfect, a warm rain, good smelling spring air, haven't lifted in a week in the hopes that my running skill would return-but nope, couldn't make it half a mile on a downhill decline.

If my running statistics weren't in black and white, people wouldn't believe I ever was a runner. The sad part is, in about a week and a half, I'll be expected to run 4 in a row as I stupidly signed up to run brew-to-brew with some friends. I know they don't care, but really, when it takes someone well into an hour to do 4 miles...they may change their minds! Don't get my wrong, my friends are the most wonderful, nonjudgemental people you'd ever meet-but I really was a runner at a time and I just think it will be shocking to them how quickly I've declined. Just last year I finished Boston, now I can't run a mile...ugh. I feel like T-rex tryin' to do pushups...something's just not clicking.

It's just difficult to accept when the one thing that defined you for so long is no longer there...not a smidgen, not a pinch. I was once a runner-not the fastest, not the slowest-but a runner nonetheless. What defines me now? Anyway, sorry to be such a Debbie Downer tonight...hopefully tomorrow my head will be up and I will make it 3/4's of a mile!


  1. I love you Kelly! I am sure I am soon to find out your frustrations when I attempt to put shoe to trail. What defines you? Running really never did. You were a fantastic runner, but more importantly, you are an amazing friend, daughter, sister, girlfriend, employee... and all of the things that are most important in life. Your running will come back but what defines you has always remained :) xoxo

  2. Aw...thanks Shell...seriously the exact words I needed to hear! XOXO