Soft and squishy!

Yes! Boobs are "done"!! My surgery Friday went quite well! Arrived bright and early with my parents

and Jon-I feel we really livin' up that joint! It was definitely the "hang out" for the murses and nurses!

 

"Y" Marks the spot!

Me and the doc talkin' shop...and by shop I mean boobs.

  The doc came in and took a final    

  look at the plastic cones. She   

  made me a bit nervous since she 

  said that we probably wouldn't   

  be able to bring the boobs in. 

  Since I did nipple sparing 

  surgery, we had to center the 

  implant around the nipple...not 

  like when you have them 

  removed-then you can put them on anywhere! But no turnin' back at that point!

All ready for surgery!!

My favorite druggies came in and gave me the gas...I seriously went into the wrong profession...no one could ever hate the anesthesiologists! They are wonderful people who do wonderful things! I don't even remember being wheeled back to the operating room! I guess after surgery, the doc came out and told my parents I was gonna look G-O-O-D! Just what my dad wanted to hear I am sure! Due to the mastectomy they had to put in two different sized implants, so my left breast is 350cc's while my right is 300cc's! Crazy how they can figure that out in the operating room with all that blood and tissue lying about!

No drinking after midnight...HA! I'm such a rebel!

Stay in school Kids.

  Before I knew it...I was
  waking up in post op-
  bandaged up like a
  mummy! The nurse
  shoved some more meds
  down my throat and I
  assured her I was ready
  to get OUTTA there! I
  headed home and rested before heading out for some Thai food with the fam! 

Jon and I after surgery heading home!

Saturday rolled around and I was a bit sore, but feeling pretty good-despite the fact that my fridge had broke and melted all over my floor! I am not supposed to lift anything over 10 pounds for 2 weeks...if you're bored at home, try it! It's amazing how difficult that is! Thankfully, Jon and my parents were around to do all the "heavy lifting." I was too nervous to take the bandages off and it technically wasn't even my day of the week to shower...so kept them on through Saturday night as well!

Yes! Headin' home!

  The "BIG REVEAL" came on Sunday! It's
  always a bit shocking at first...tears streamed down
  my face as I stared at my reconstructed chest. I had
  thoughts of Pamela Anderson, running down the
  Baywatch Beach-but what I saw was more of a
  Dr. 90210 enhancement job gone wrong! It looked
  like one of the boobs was the mother boob of the
  other one, my nipples were still all cockeyed, that
  mixed with the scars, cuts, glues, and rash that I
  got from the dermabond pushed me over the edge!
  I immediately called my parents; my mom, the level-headed one said to give it time. That I had just had invasive surgery and that it would be just fine!  My dad-the crazy one, told me not to worry, he had recently watched a movie where the actresses big boobs had nipples that pointed out to the side...Thanks Dad!! ;)

But honestly...they were both right. Already the swelling has gone down and everything is looking much better-today my doc said I still had a bit of fluid in one breast and once that was out, they would be a near match. My dad also called me today and told me about three young men who had just been admitted to the burn unit at the hospital I went to - 90% of their bodies covered in burns...and I'm worried about a stray nip?!? How incredibly selfish am I! Nothing like an incredible family that puts it all in perspective for you! 

My incredibly strong support system...physically and emotionally.
I could not as for more...I love you!!!

FINALLY!!!!

Wow...it's been a while, but figured it was time to hop back on the blogger bandwagon as tomorrow is my FINAL surgery!! Yes, after tomorrow I will stop bruising people with my hugs, I will be able to lay on my stomach, I will have boobs that bounce, move and most importantly...are cancer free (though I s'pose they have been for a while now)!!

My last expansion to the full 275 cc's occurred on August 18th, and was by far the most painful one yet. I had a hard time sleeping, sitting, being awake basically! Unfortunately for Shelley, I did not have a hard time whining about it-she had to spend that entire weekend with me! Seems so long ago now! The doc scheduled my surgery for October 10th...she was booking up fast, everyone wants new boobs for the holidays I guess! Well, due to a wedding in North Dakota, I had to move the surgery, but that's okay...family is more important than any 'ol surgery, the wedding was beautiful and an ABSOLUTE BLAST...and really, what was a few more weeks at that point??

Fast forward to today! Went to the doc for pre-surgery work up and blood draw. She answered all my questions and walked me through what would occur while I'm sleeping tomorrow...I am in good hands.
Here it is, less than a year from original diagnosis-it's truly amazing how much your life, attitude, well being...how everything can change in a year. Good days, bad days, I know more than ever that I am loved and the luckiest person ever with all the incredible people in my life! I could go on and on...but to be honest, my mind is bouncing around as much as my boobs will be in a few weeks! So for today, think I will sign off! This time, I promise to not let it sit for 2 months...updates after surgery!!

My incredible family (Missing Kim, Don, Doni, and Sophia though)!!

Top Heavy!

Well, went to the doc yesterday, she said that now my skin is wanting to cooperate, so they put another 30 cc's in. To be kinda honest, I was hoping they'd say I was all full and set a surgery date, oh well! One more fill next Thursday to get me to the predesignated 275, then I wait a month, then I do the big switch out. I am ready too! I just feel so big! I found my sports bra difficult to maneuver when I went to the gym last night. I don't think I'm a vain person, but spent most of my warmup on the treadmill staring at my "Baywatch Breasts" in the mirror! Right now they are hard plastic, so I hurt most people I hug and they are further apart then they will be after the big change out...which, trust me...is not good when you're sweating!! Overall this is all going so fast, but some days (weeks) it seems to drag a bit!

I was running a little late and wasn't able to make Shelley's first chemo appointment, but I did see her yesterday and of course, she's a positivity power house! Would ya really expect anything less?? I have to get her the new "What's on Your Rack" shirt (shown below)! My wonderful friend Duane Daugherty makes quite the tasty bbq sauce (www.mrdoggity.com) and had this wonderful pink shirt made for me! He's been one of my biggest supporters, I love him and his wonderful wife Cheryl...really, two of the most wonderful people you could ever have in life! Thank you Duane for how great you've been since I've met you!!

Yep...just woke up! I wear this shirt to the gym, to sleep, to mow...It's wonderful! Thanks Duane and Cheryl!!!! XOXO

Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today... ~James Dean

My First Haircut!!!!!

Had my doc appointment last Thursday-they added 25 more, but said my skin is too thin so we're done!!! I'm at 225 cc's right now, and I was supposed to go to 275-but this is close enough for me! I have an appointment in two weeks to set a surgery date (probably early September)! I could not be more ecstatic! In other exciting news...I went for my first haircut today! My hair seems to be growing all random and wavy, so she cleaned it up and added some wax to complete my faux hawk! I love it! I actually took the blog title of this one from the bathroom at the stylist's! Love the quote...looking back over this quick update, I sure love a lot today! It's just been perfect! XOXO

Cancer needs to get cancer.

Dying Sam's hair!!

So I am at a stopping point (for a bit). Saw the doc-my doc-yesterday, she confirmed that "yes, those are in fact stitches." She then proceeded to take the stitches out that had already popped through my skin, she slapped on some ointment, put on a bandaid and told me to wait another week for a fill. She said my skin is pretty thin so not sure how much more we can fill - guess I'm destined to be an A+ cup, which is quite fine by me, I once heard that more than a handful is too much anyway (oops...earmuffs dad)!

Just testin' out the gals!

Anyway, I cannot complain, I am on the downhill. For those of you who are my faithful blog followers (thank you Laurie), you have read about my wonderful friend Shelley! Compassionate, positive, great cook, smart, has ridiculously good looking friends...you know the girl. Well, turns out she has triple negative breast cancer - just found out on July 18th...as you can see, me and my friends are complete attention whores! (Kidding)!

I don't know what this epidemic is that's going around and I have no idea why it would ever fall on someone who really does know how to live life. I truly do believe life gives you only what you can handle, unfortunately for Shelley, she can handle A LOT! Shelley is ridiculously strong, I don't think I even realized how strong she was until this point. She is always the one to take care of all of us, always on the go, if she has a free minute she will fill it with friends, family, and love! She makes every person in her life feel like the most important person. It will definitely be interesting to see Shelley let someone take care of her for once!!!

My sister Kimberwolf once said, "It's amazing how one word can change your life." Which is so true...

 Most amazing gal!

I was also once told by person, who will remain anonymous, that if I said "I love you" all the time, the sincerity would wear off, it wouldn't mean anything. Well, with that, I heavily disagree...and my "life changing" moment just makes me realize that much more how incredibly lucky and blessed I am. I love life, I love Shelley, I love all my friends and family - with all my sincerity and not just from the bottom, but from the sides, front, and back of my heart...I LOVE YOU! XOXO

If you want to read how incredibly positive, uplifting, and amazing my friend Shelley is, check out her blog at: http://shellsbuzz.blogspot.com! I also added a video on the bottom originally posted by our friend James, which I find hilarious...but WARNING...if easily offended, DO NOT watch!!!

My favorite picture...Shelley has the best smile!

And here I thought I was thick skinned...

This is not to scale...

So I believe this is kind of how the tissue expander is in me...the doc removed all the breast tissue, than lifted my pec muscle (which I am sure was a ton of work since I'm HUGE)! They put the expander under the muscle, than surrounded the bottom of the expander with cadaver tissue, stitching the tissue to my pec muscle, that way the entire expander is surrounded, on the top with my [HUGE] pec and underneath with cadaver tissue. They do this to ensure that the tissue expander is protected, if the expander "sees the light of day" as my doctor said, then they have to remove it and start from scratch.

Sweet edit job yo. 

Why all this information now?? Well it looks like my expander is wanting out...I have a couple of stitches trying to pop through my skin. So needless to say, I didn't have a fill this week, the nurse wants to wait until I can see MY doctor. She doesn't think it'll be a big deal, but just wants to ensure that nothing will tear through, for fear of starting from scratch. I am happy they are so incredibly cautious-so my appointment with the doc is Thursday at 2...hopefully everything will turn out all right and I can continue with my fills! Almost done, almost done...

I like big boobs and I cannot lie...

I am up to 200 cc's now and feel great...except for the pointy edges of the expanders diggin' into my skin. I have about two fills left, than I sit for a month before going into surgery and replacing the expanders with silicone implants. It's just nice to be moving forward in this process and to actually see the finish line...I guess to relate it to running terms, I'm at about mile 22 and haven't "hit the wall" yet, the finish line is just in sight!! Thankfully, my wonderful friend Hollie has been documenting every cc of saline and is making a "movie" to be published here on this blog displaying my ever expanding chest...just to give you sneak peak I pulled one of the pictures she took at my last fill (150 ccs)...see below! Two things to note about this photo...all of my FANTASTIC hair, and how big I am in comparison to that double bubble!! More to come - Love you all!

**Almost forgot to add, my incredible friend Sam killed her structural engineering exam!!! Passed with flying colors! The odds of getting breast cancer are much higher than the odds of passing that exam. She is officially the smartest girl in the country! Way to go Sam!!!